February 16th, 2025

One thing that I’ve realized being a mother to an ever changing toddler is that there is something so utterly tragic about the way we strip the world of its magic as children grow up. Do we do it on purpose? Out of necessity? Or are we just so numb to the extraordinary that we no longer recognize its value? In these times of being

so technologically advanced, have we lost our kids to screens and social media? What are parents of today’s youth doing to encourage “irl” enrichment/play?

Small children, fresh into this world, see things with an intensity and openness that most adults have long abandoned. And yet, we shove them into rigid boxes, tell them to sit still, color inside the lines, and follow directions, robbing them of the one thing that makes childhood so uniquely powerful: imagination. While at such an impressionable age it is important for children to explore different curiosities often building confidence through self expression.

Lately, my astonishingly ingenious 4 year old son (omg I really have a 4 yr. old ahhh) has grown an obsession with the art of fort-making. Oh yes, he takes great pride in rearranging all of my furniture, and pulling every blanket, sheet and pillow he can find into a pile on my living room floor, tucking and draping them between the couch cushions in what he calls “decorating”.

Part of me is wildly impressed by his creativity, while the other is seething at the sight of the pillows I lay my face on being strewn about on the floor. Ultimately, I decide to let him indulge in imaginative play, (with the couch pillows as a compromise) as being an artist myself I resonate with the feeling of content that comes from expressing creativity.

The Evolution of Consciousness and Creativity

From infancy, a child's brain is a masterpiece of growth and transformation. Studies show that newborns operate primarily on sensation and reflex, yet by six months, they are already beginning to understand cause and effect. By age two, toddlers experience an explosion in language and symbolic thought—meaning that the couch is no longer just a couch; it’s a castle, a spaceship, or an ocean wave ready to swallow them whole. This is the golden age of pretend play, of make-believe worlds that exist solely because a child wills them into being.

Jean Piaget, the pioneering Swiss psychologist, outlined four main stages of cognitive development:

1. **Sensorimotor Stage (0-2 years):** The world is a sensory playground. Everything must be touched, tasted, thrown, and banged together to make sense.

2. **Preoperational Stage (2-7 years):** Language and imagination explode. Children can now engage in pretend play, seeing the world not as it is, but as it could be.

3. **Concrete Operational Stage (7-11 years):** Logical thinking develops, but creativity still thrives in tangible, structured ways.

4. **Formal Operational Stage (12+ years):** Abstract thought takes center stage, and unfortunately, this is often where societal expectations begin to crush freeform creativity.

If we’re not careful, this is also when children start losing their ability to imagine boundlessly. It is no coincidence that many schools begin prioritizing rote memorization and test-taking over creative exploration at precisely the age when cognitive flexibility could still be nurtured.

The Social Cost of Lost Imagination

Here’s the real kicker: as we push children toward standardized thinking, we also diminish their capacity for social awareness. Research suggests that imaginative play directly correlates with empathy and emotional intelligence. When kids take on roles in make-believe scenarios, they’re not just entertaining themselves; they’re practicing the art of perspective-taking.

Ever notice how a three-year-old can cry over a sad cartoon character as if they were experiencing the loss themselves? That’s because their emotional boundaries are still porous; they feel everything with raw intensity. But as they grow older, we tell them to toughen up, to be realistic, to stop dreaming. And slowly, the ability to deeply connect with others—an ability nurtured through storytelling and creative play—begins to fade.

Creating Spaces for Imagination to Thrive

So, what’s the solution? It starts with recognizing that creativity isn’t just a cute phase—it’s an essential part of cognitive and social development. We need to create spaces where kids are free to dream, to build, to invent, and to be ridiculous without fear of correction or judgment. We need schools that value play as much as they do math, parents who foster curiosity rather than stifle it, and communities that encourage exploration beyond screens and worksheets.

Because let’s be real: the world doesn’t need more rule-followers. It needs thinkers, artists, and dreamers. And if we don’t protect the sacred space of childhood imagination, we risk raising a generation that sees the world only as it is—not as it could be.

4/17/23

We’ve all seen the over-used movie trope where the sweet and shy girl crushes on the overly confident and aggressive alpha male type. There’s a mystical magnetism that seems to pull this unlikely pair together despite the lack of shared values and interests, and everyone’s wondering how they ended up together.

“What it would be like to experience THAT” is what they’re both thinking, sometimes subconsciously. At least that’s how I always fall into it. Not without consequences do we choose which reality we want to settle in, by making a decision and taking continuous action. Cause and effect. With this awareness you can eliminate any victim mentality and take accountability for your part in choosing the path you’re on. We are after-all, co-creating our reality with every second that passes.

At the end of the day, every encounter we have acts as a mirror teaching us something about our selves; what we appreciate, what we don’t appreciate, how we like to be treated, how we should be loved, who we can trust and so on. Choosing to be with someone knowing that they live a completely different lifestyle than you’re used to and comfortable with, can be an enlightening some may say reckless and risky move because you never know what you’re gonna get. But the heart wants what the heart wants.

Intrigue is what it is. Back to the aforementioned couple. Someone bold, who loves attention and knows how to get it, someone daring with smooth criminal vibes and powers of persuasion- sharpens the somewhat passive demeanor she possesses, and allows her to live out her suppressed wild side. He teaches her how to let go of fear and live more free- and she teaches him kindness and unconditional understanding.

The infatuation shared becomes less love and more toxic when the girl leans into her power, and refuses to be submissive. To a narcissist this is the worst thing you can do. This incites the inevitable, the power struggle of who’s more dominant and stronger willed and the mind games in order to each get what they want out of the relationship.

Like the saying goes, opposites attract. But why is that? And is it possible that all this couple shares is merely curiosity and intrigue for one another’s different pov?

We have to understand that every couple is different and depending on the maturity levels of the parties involved this couple, being opposites could either balance each other out nicely, or they could spend a lot time trying the challenge each other. We all have needs and desires, and the universe knows. I believe we attract partners that challenge us in a way that is sometimes necessary to the next level of life. Like defeating the Boss in a video game, once you finally reach that point, you level up and advance to a higher level.

Ultimately though, if there’s no mutual respect, both people making an effort to listen to one another and understand where they are coming from, there is no healthy love. If there is an uneven exchange of giving and receiving, that can become a toxic relationship because someone may feel like they are not appreciated and can become resentful.

Toxic or not every relationship will teach us about ourselves and what we will not tolerate. You never know unless you try but once you know, you better start to make better decisions in love!

Me to myself about myself lol.

Scrolling through my instagram timeline these days, I’m overwhelmed with posts about people’s New Year’s Resolutions, and my favorite caption: “soft life era”. Carousel posts are surfacing of women embracing their bodies and stepping into their femininity, acknowledging their desires to live more peacefully and intentionally, and I’m here for it. It’s not a new concept. The past few years in fact, we’ve seen a rise on social media in people stressing the importance of self care and self discovery. It’s about time.

While I do think the term “soft life” lends itself to becoming another social media trend, I do believe it’s great that we’re seeing more people realize the need for slowing down in this fast paced society, and focusing on the things that allow us to feel refreshed and rejuvenated. Whether it’s treating yourself to something that will make you feel brand new, or removing toxic people from your life- this is a good thing.

Soft life to me means not stressing, or worrying, but allowing yourself to align with your true purpose. Life is hard enough as it is, we’ve gotta give ourselves time to revel in the little things that make us happy, and not take life for granted. Every day is an opportunity to become a better version of ourselves.